| Name: | The Luciferian Sanctuary of the Pine Lizard |
| Goal: | get really good at yo-yoing |
| Methods: |
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| Income source: | fake firefighters asking for donations |
| Headquarters: | prefab aluminium building in Paris TX |
| Commander: | The Superior Marshal |
| Minion: | "scholar" |
| Axiom: | "The whole is greater than the part." |
| Beliefs: |
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