Your occult organization:

Name: The Exoteric House of the Clay Troll
Goal: destroy all television sets on the planet
Methods:
  • tarot cards
  • chips implanted in people's skulls
  • militarized aspartame
Income source: fake firefighters asking for donations
Headquarters: somewhere in Nevada
Commander: The Grand Patriarch
Minion: "catechumen"
Axiom: "Who will be eaten first?"
Beliefs:
  • eating insects is the path to enlightenment
  • elephants can listen in on cell phone calls
  • crystals can heal AIDS

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