| Name: | The Mystic Devotees of the Brown Cup |
| Goal: | destroy the English language through division into multiple dialects |
| Methods: |
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| Income source: | stealing fractions of pennies from every transaction on the NYSE |
| Headquarters: | office building in New York City |
| Commander: | The Director |
| Minion: | "inmate" |
| Axiom: | "Man is dead." |
| Beliefs: |
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