| Name: | The Mysterious Coalition of the Chrome Lamb |
| Goal: | spread the true story of Jesus |
| Methods: |
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| Income source: | animal prostitution |
| Headquarters: | home office in Pittsburgh |
| Commander: | The Most Grand Hiparch |
| Minion: | "sister" |
| Axiom: | "All thought is useless." |
| Beliefs: |
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