| Name: | The Mystic Coven of the Infinite Vampire |
| Goal: | destroy all television sets on the planet |
| Methods: |
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| Income source: | money is for infidels |
| Headquarters: | undiscovered pacific island |
| Commander: | The Distinguished Leader |
| Minion: | "heel" |
| Axiom: | "chance is the only thing you can trust" |
| Beliefs: |
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