Your occult organization:

Name: The Teutonic Commandery of the Styrofoam Chapel
Goal: destroy South America
Methods:
  • fatty foods
Income source: sandwich franchise
Headquarters: space station
Commander: The Distinguished Governor
Minion: "soldier"
Axiom: "If life gives you lemons, make shit."
Beliefs:
  • the Illuminati controls the government
  • the I Ching answers all questions accurately

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